What's your superpower?

Have you ever heard someone give a speech to a room full of people but felt that they were talking just to you?

Well, that happened to me the other day with Liz Gilbert.

She was talking at a conference about the next revolution she's hoping to see in the world for women. And it's not about being more fierce, more badass, or more of any of the things that women already are.

What she thinks is going to revolutionize the world is women being relaxed.

And you see, that's kind of my superpower.

Am I relaxed all the time? Hell no. Is anyone? In fact, I suffer from chronic migraines brought on by feeling too much.

But when people have to describe me, whether they've known me for a long time or we've just met, the overwhelming word I hear the most is calm.

The only problem is that I've always felt that my sense of calm, my capacity to relax, to spend an hour looking at the sky or a single piece of coral with barely a thought in my mind, was a weakness.

One of the reasons behind my migraines and most of my problems in life is that I've always tried to fight against my nature and be more like other people just to belong.

Because when you're relaxed, people tell you you're lazy. You don't have enough drive and ambition, you're not hustling, and you're wasting your waking hours.

I've always been told that I need to worry more. That I should know where I want to be in 5 years. That I should think more about decisions before I make them.

The truth is that there are very few decisions that I've struggled with in life. Whether it's moving to a different continent, quitting my job without a plan, ending a relationship, pivoting to a new career, or deciding what degree to study in uni. When it's time to decide, I'll think about things once and then go with my gut. And if my gut's not saying anything, I'll flip a coin.

No drama, no second guessing myself, no weeks of pre-work weighing up all the options and making checklists.

I just know that no matter what I decide in life, I am where I need to be, and it will all be ok in the end.

So I'm relaxed, I trust, and I love to live that way. It's only when I let the outside world place their worries and fears on my shoulders that I think I'm wrong for being the way I am.

That's why listening to Liz Gilbert's talk, I felt that she wrote it just for me.

She told me that I was right all along, just how I am. She told me that I don't need to struggle so much to fit in with the world because the world actually wants more of what I have.

Of course, she's so brilliant that I'm sure each of the 200 women in the room would have said exactly the same thing. That's what makes her so magical.

So I'm owning my relaxedness.

I'm not going to feel guilty that I've come to a new country, and instead of frantic sightseeing, I've spent most of my time sitting on benches watching the people that walk by.

I'm not going to feel guilty when I spend so many hours looking at the waves lapping at the shore that I can see the tides change as I sit.

I'm not going to feel guilty when I jump in the water for a quick dip and end up looking at a tiny shrimp digging a hole in the sand for so long that the sun burns my butt cheeks.

Because that woman is wise, and she said that's what the world needs. So I'm embracing it with both hands.

How about you? Are you embracing your superpowers?

Because maybe what you've been fighting against your whole life is exactly what the world needs.

Sending you all so much love,

Paula

P.S. This conference was organized by the fabulous ladies at Wine, Women, & Well-being in Calgary and was specifically for women.

But this message very much applies to all the men out there, too, who can do with a little more calm and ease in their lives!